My Baldness.

I you have seen me in the last two weeks you would have noticed that I substantially less hair. This would be because I shaved my head as part of the worlds greatest shave. That is a great cause and a fantastic reason to bald, but it is not the real reason that I did it.

I chose to shave my head one day in January when I was bored. I was just sitting around thinking that my life was very safe and static in someways. So I decided to shave my head.

Another factor that contributed to my decision was the fact that the idea of shaving my head scared the pants off me1. Mainly because, as an insecure person, my hair was one of the few things about my appearance that i could control2. Now, I know you shouldn't worry about what other people think, especially about how you look, but I do. I think everyone does and anyone that says they don't at all is lying. I'm not saying that it is my greatest concern and it didn't have a huge affect on how I dressed or anything, but it was there. So the idea of doing something as drastic as shaving my hair off obviously got me sweating.

Now on the other side of the shave. I love it. Not only does it not look anywhere near as bad as I thought it would, I feel fantastic about the whole thing. I'm feeling less self-conscious than ever. I'm finding it very liberating. This is exactly why i do things that scare me. Hopefully there will be more blogs on doing things that scare me coming soon....

1 It obviously didn't actually remove my pants, that would have be awkward. Plus I was probably wearing board shorts.

2 that is, you can't control how your face looks and you can do a small amount do alter you body type. All you can really change is your cloths and hair.3

3 How much better for footnoting are these small numbers. There comes a point that *'s are not subtle at all.

A day in the life of my phone sock.

I woke at 9:30 when the phone on top of me started to vibrate (vvvvt vvvvt) and make other annoying noises.

I looked upon the sock draw with sadness, remembering the time i tried to go in there and all the regular foot socks picked on me and said i wasn't a real sock. I'll show them! When I finally get thongs monitory they'll more out of fashion than Aqua. However this plan has taken a hit with the liberals election loss as my friend, John Howard's phone sock has less power. Not to worry, it will happen.

The day looks to be picking up from there as I go to work protecting the phone. Nothing really exciting at first, the phone just gets thrown in this guys backpack. It's so boring in here and the phone barely talks at all. Lunch time, and he checks his phone. And again. And again. On, off, on, off, what's this guys issue? Is he that insecure that he need to check his phone every five seconds to see if he has a friend? Then it happens. VVVVVVT! My whole world shakes. I hate vibrate. He replies and this starts a string of 10 messages, and I'm starting to get a headache. Oh great, now he's playing a game and I just get tossed aside. Not to worry, I'm slowly resting the high scores on all the games while they sleep.

The day picked in the afternoon when basketball was on. I didn't get to play of cause, but the phone did get thrown on the ground so was at least keeping the phone out of the dirt.

It has been a long day. Then after protecting his phone from all that, his still puts me under the phone for the night. What the hell buddy, don't i deserve a rest at night?! The phone's just sitting there, what is going to happen to it? Anyway, that's my day. Over and out!

A night out.

I was out with friends in the city. Over all it was a good night and we all had a lot of fun. However there was a point that I looked at everything and couldn't help but think about how sad it was.

We were upstairs at a pub in the city and there was a band playing. To me there's just something sad about a cover band. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with playing some covers, but when your band's name is "Mimic", you don't seem to be aiming very high. A lot of the joy in playing music* is creating. It's expressing yourself in a really deep way that you can't with words or any other medium so, when the band is just copying what others have made, it's a bit sad that they are missing out on such a massive, and fantastic part of it.
Then there was the audience. We were clearly the youngest people there and our average age was 20. So often you hear people saying how sad it is to see drunken youth, but to me it's way more pathetic seeing thirty year old people getting smashed. Youth is the time that you test the boundary and explore the world, find yourself and your place in the world. If there's ever a time to drink to much it's then, not when your thirty. By then you're meant to be matured and responsible, I'm not saying no fun, but surely past thinking that it'll be a good idea to drinking so much that you spill your drink on everyone else on the dance floor and then fall over.
Then, as I looked over the band trying to hold on to their dreams playing to the adults trying to hold on to their youth, I noticed the saddest person in the pub. He was standing up the back alone. This fella** was clearly with a group but was not part of it as he was the only one not having a great time. All he could do was sit back and watch because*** he could not just let go and have a good time. He was to caught up in feeling superior to everyone by sitting back and judging them.

But before long we left there**** and we continued having a good night. I did see the people for that pub again. But I'm sure I will before long.



*this is of cause all just my opinion. But as this in my blog, tough luck, if you don't like it go write your own.

**I really like the word "fella". I want to use it more often.

*** this was just to have a third footnote.

****And by left I mean half the group left because one of us got thrown out for being a drunken mess and falling on people (while dancing. and not on the dance floor anymore). Then the other half left shortly after. I guess this one makes that last footnote even more pointless.

My Psalm

This is the psalm that i wrote on beach mission.

I am amazed, oh Lord, at how you love me,
even when I'm down and defeated.
When I'm beyond contempt and can't even love myself,
Your love for me never wavers.

I am amazed, oh Lord, at how you love me,
so much to place me here and now.
On your earth, with so much beauty,
where I can see your majesty in every glance.

I am amazed, oh Lord, at how you love me,
this broken, battered, shallow man.
Nothing special or amazing,
yet you hold me in your heart.

I am amazed, oh Lord, at how you love me,
enough to let me know your grace.
Not just with me at my trial,
but enought to take my place.

An after lunch blog.

That's right, I just had lunch. Yum.

Subheading One : Why Audioslave Rocks.
I reasently rediscovered* Audioslave. There are two main reasons why this band is good.
Reason one: Tom Morello. They guy is just plain fantastic. He's not quite as out there in Audioslave as he was/is in Rage but he still rocks harder than most by a fair margin. And when he has the same bass and drums behind him as in Rage, it just keeps getting better and better.

Reason two: Chris Cornell.
Man can this guy really wail. But more than that, his singing has such a free flow to it but it is never out of time or place. If you haven't heard him/them, I earge you to. Today! Go to where ever it is you get your music and get some. I suggest "Your time has come", "Be yourself", or "The worm" form "out of exile" (or the rest of the CD, it's all good) and "Cochise" from their self titled album.

Subheading Two: Some other thoughts
If to dumb something down is to make it simpler, then does that mean that it you dumb something up you make it more complex?
Is it horrible inappropriate to be walking round the pool you're life guarding singing "Drown me slowly"**?

That's about all I had flowting round my head during lunch.

*by "rediscovered" I mean, I hadn't heard them in a decent while and them they pop up in my ipod's shuffle and I thought, "that's right, Audioslave are awesome!"

** also an Audioslave song. Actually this is the song that pop up on shuffle. True story.

My Big Day Out.

Ah, what a day. The day really started at 11 as I walked through the gates. Straight away I made contact with my mate form uni and companion for the day. Big plus. Then the music started and we were off.

We started out wanting to check out the jjj unearthed winners but wondered into Miso instead. Mistake, they are spacey electric stuff that probably would have sounded great after a bucket load of LSD. When we found The Pryor Theory, they weren't much better. Less LSD but still not something you want to stand in a crowd for. So we moved on.

Passing by Die! Die! Die!, we found out way to British India. If you have a chance, check them out, they are good live. We rocked out for a few songs but both being science students we were allured by a band with a nerdy name*. The Eddy Current Suppression Ring, nerdy name with a punk sound and the simplest drum kit I've seen on stage. The music was good and the singer had a dancing style that look like a young Joe Croker gone punk.

We then found our way to the main stage for the first time to see Anti-flag. Angry boys that do a good job of being the cliche rebellious punk band. They had a Mohawk, wore black, played loud and screamed, but for some reason their American specific anthems didn't do much for us. We found more joy when we wondered into Brotha Black, an Aboriginal hip-hop artist. Pretty sweet.

We were pulled back to the main stage for Faker. Win. From the moment the sing ran onto, then around the stage, I knew it was going to be good. The music was great and the performance one of the best for the day. The singer was fantastic, he went for running around, to jumping for speaker to speaker, to rolling around on the ground, to climbing the scaffolding without missing a note.

We strayed from the main stage again for Gyroscope. Not a mistake but we didn't stay long. Back again to the main stage for the end of Midnight Juggernauts and then Regurgitator. Remember them, they had hits with polyester girl and !(the song formally know as the song formally know as !) and they spent some time in a bubble. They well worth the walk**. They passed through so many genres in the hour they almost got a speeding fine.

Just a few steps away on the other main stage was the Hoods. I was afraid they would play the same set as they did at pyramid, but i had nothing to worry about, they even had some new friends on stage. Low rider*** played with the Hood for about half the set and it good. One thing that made me sad was the crowds reaction to the Aboriginal welcome ceremony before the Hoods Played. They showed it no respect. Just a few steps back to the first main stage for Grinspoon who did play pretty much the same set as at pyramid, but whee it rocks that hard you just don't mind that much. Still no just ace, most sad.

Next came tea. Hot chips from Nandos and a look at the Nightwatchman. Tom Morello's song acoustic project. Rage-brilliant, Audioslave-rocks, this-not so much. Then the real fun started.

Back for the final time to the main stage. First up, Silverchair. Well the old Silverchair is pretty much gone but the new puts on a good show. Jones is still rocks and the inclusion of the greatest view and freak kept me happy. And then, the longest hour ever! What were the organisers thinking, "I know what will go well between Silverchair and Rage Against the Machine. Bjork". NO! Now I wouldn't normally mind a bit of Bjork, but not there. And when so many of the crowd and turned up to see Rage, not many where I was enjoyed Bjork.

Then it happened. And I don't mean a punch on, which did break out just next to me. Rage Against The Machine! Best Ever! It started with testify and kept going****. The whole thing was one giant high light. From Zack's rant against war and consumerism and props for getting rid of Howard to Tom's Guitar. I didn't think it would get much better than Freedom and Killing in the Name for an encore, but there was short patch, for most of Sleep Now in the Fire, that everyone around me was moshing perfectly in time. It was just beautiful, Dream Come True!

We strolled away for that 70 mins happy beyond description. Nothing was left, in the line up or us, but to jam on a train and go home. We scored seats and conversation with strangers started by my F.R.O.G band, win.

Well that was my Big Bay Out. Nothing that anyone really needed to know, I was just wanting to brag, and to keep the blog momentum going. *****



*plus we had seen them at pyramid rock.

**not that we walked far. I just didn't want to say fantastic again so soon.

*** Hip-hop band with singer, keys, bass, drums.

****for the full set list see the herald sun hit lift out on thursday Jan 24, or my post on Sean Bentler's facebook wall.

*****you may have noticed a lot of the end notes in this post. That is because I love them. The best end note are by Terry Pracket. They are mostly factual information about made up things that don't add anything to the story. I am going to try and use them more as they are fun. Thanks goes to B.C for reminding me of them.

The building yay.

This is about my new car.

I started out not excited about it at all. After all the time and effort it took just to get my last car on the road, only for it to have a minor brake down. Then after just 5-6 months it dies completely. Plus the whole process of finding and deciding to but this car felt very rushed. It was just about the first car we saw for sale after my previous car was condemned. I wanted to take my time and find an awesome car that I was ultra excited about. Then dad found this cat, that's right I didn't even really get to find it. I was a good deal and was in good condition. I had look around and could not find anything as good.

So we checked it out. It really was very clean and in fantastic condition. The owner's grandma had bought it new and had driven it up until about a year and a half ago. So, it was low on km's and had been well looked after. It fill all my reasonably criteria but I was still very unenthusiastic. So after a bit of thought and consultation with my mechanic friend, I decided to buy the car.

Still my enthusiasm for the whole deal did not rise. It took a good 2 weeks for the car to be ready, which did not phase me as I was rather indifferent and on beach mission. Then I got home and after a few days my car was ready. I had been working in Mirboo North, a half hour drive, so I had been borrowing my parents car or getting a lift. After that, the idea of having a car of my own again was sounding good.

So I got the car, but all the paperwork still stood in the way, squashing my excitement. it just reminded me of all the work we went through with my last car only for it to die. Luckily, the guy we bought the car off had done most of the form to change the rego, so all we had to do was fill in my details and take it down to vicroad. The insurance and RACV turned out to be just short phone calls. At it was all mine. The excitement levels were starting to pick up. I was really happy with the idea that I had a car, but not over the moon about the actual one I had.

Then two small acts started my enthusiasm in the upwards direction. I cleaned it. In the two and a half years I owned my other cars, I didn't clean them one. I washed it and vacuum cleaned the inside. Then i got some hub caps. And BAM, I start thinking, 'this car doesn't look half bad'. Then I started to drive it a bit.

After months of being stuck in family car with poor radios, to be in my own car with a decent Cd player and good rear speaker was awesome! I drove it to the city for a party. The party, horrible, but the drive was fantastic. From there the enthusiasm has continued to grow. I came out of work last night and was like 'dam my car looks cool'. Add to that the impending inclusion of my Cd player and front speakers I'm finally at the point of saying, 'Yay! I have a new car!'.